friend of mine works at SECU and said a new employee came in obviously drunk and had a water bottle filled with vodka. when confronted, he said that he woke up drunk and thought the best way to quell the hangover was to keep it going.

I've never seen anything like this, have any of y'all?

7/12/2012 6:10:47 PM

had a dude fired for drinking at work. not sure how he pulled it off b/c he was in another department

7/12/2012 6:17:34 PM

Is this a "worst excuses for firing someone" or "most ludicrous things people have done that resulted in their termination" ?

7/12/2012 6:19:31 PM

the only people i've known to be fired were fired for kind of BS reasons. clearly (or not so clearly to many people) orchestrated by people who had no business to be doing such. like being sick/late too many days. which seems reasonable but not when you consider how many others are doing the same but are more well liked by the boss lady.

[Edited on July 12, 2012 at 6:20 PM. Reason : ]

7/12/2012 6:19:37 PM

My cousin got fired for bringing a stun gun to work because she was selling it to a co-worker

7/12/2012 6:22:49 PM

Dweedle got fired from Taco Bell at Talley for fucking a crunchwrap supreme

7/12/2012 6:25:43 PM

Friend of mine got fired from Food Lion for eating a doughnut that was labeled to be thrown out. He's brought them home before and they taste just fine you just can't sell them after a certain date. He had been a manager at that store for 3 plus years.

7/12/2012 6:28:35 PM

This is meant to be more of bad shit that people have done to result in termination. Like puking on the floor during a meeting, fucking in the office, etc

7/12/2012 6:33:28 PM

when i worked at the ale house, a couple guys were fired for doing coke off the counter in the women's restroom during the employee christmas party

another year during the party, one employee got so drunk he punched one of the touchscreen computers and they fired him

[Edited on July 12, 2012 at 6:38 PM. Reason : .]

7/12/2012 6:35:28 PM

My boy Craig got fired for stealing boxes on his day off.

7/12/2012 6:37:46 PM

Whoops

[Edited on July 12, 2012 at 6:43 PM. Reason : Iphone double post ]

7/12/2012 6:42:36 PM

I don't really have stories of people getting fired, because usually they'd commit felonies or whatnot and then skip town. But I'll post them anyway since they are fire able offenses

Manager would steal money from the store and hold meetings, asking people to come forward and either point out the culprit or confess/return the money no questions asked. We shared the building with another store so he started blaming the management there. There were cameras that he said he checked, or maybe they didn't work. I can't remember. Eventually he was caught somehow and he skipped town. Turns out he had warrants in several states.

A management husband/wife duo used store money to buy drugs. They were eventually outed and I think arrested but long after I left.

One guy skipped town after absolutely corrupting a female coworker and acquaintance of mine because he had several warrants out in other states.

I guess the only time someone was fired was when this complete blonde moron tried to give her friends the hookup by ringing up the meal properly then applying a 10% then 50% discount, then voiding several items off of the bill - all of which shows up on the company's receipt of course. With management there watching her as she rung up her obvious crowd of friends. He walked over and fired her on the spot.

I can't remember, but another girl may have either quit or gotten fired soon after she did coke in the bathroom and left a line on the toilet back for said blonde moron. She was a cool girl but hated the management.

Another blonde white trash idiot got romantically involved with a decent guy and quit a little while after she got pregnant. I can't remember why he left...Probably warrants. Or if he left while I was still there.

Another store (Lowes)

I don't remember it specifically but you could get fired if you drug usable items out if the trash chute or out of the dumpster... Shit like microwaves in the box that were simply excess inventory, or items that had nothing wrong with them yet were customer returns.

[Edited on July 12, 2012 at 6:54 PM. Reason : hsjs]

7/12/2012 6:49:50 PM

^ Andy's hired some sketch mother fuckers.

7/12/2012 6:53:27 PM

In high school my best friend was fired from chick-fil-a for having an extra sandwich at lunch. First offense, and had a clean slate. We still laugh about it 12 years later.

7/12/2012 6:57:51 PM

When I started at my the high school where I work, my co-workers told me of a guy the year before who got fired for test fraud. The story goes that administration had been hounding him again and again to bring up his exam scores, so finally at one semester's end he just decides to give the kids the answers, "Those of you with test form H7, number one is B. Those of you with test form J2, the answer is D," and so on. Allegedly he was walked out in handcuffs after the students told everyone.

7/12/2012 6:59:46 PM

I need to go dumpster diving at lowes apparently

7/12/2012 7:01:24 PM

An assistant manager at the CVS I worked at in Raleigh got fired for stealing candy bars, drinks, chips, etc. While doing some repairs they found his hidden stash of wrappers and empty bottles up in ceiling of the overstock room.

It's one thing to steal food from work but then to hoard all of the evidence in the freaking ceiling.

7/12/2012 7:03:35 PM

Quote :

"Friend of mine got fired from Food Lion for eating a doughnut that was labeled to be thrown out. He's brought them home before and they taste just fine you just can't sell them after a certain date. He had been a manager at that store for 3 plus years."

Quote :

"I don't remember it specifically but you could get fired if you drug usable items out if the trash chute or out of the dumpster... Shit like microwaves in the box that were simply excess inventory, or items that had nothing wrong with them yet were customer returns. "

yeah, stores consider that theft. 2-3 people got fired from petsmart when i was there for that same deal.

also a manager got fired for stealing from the registers and the safe. moron.

7/12/2012 8:19:06 PM

this one dude at work got fired for murdering his wife.

7/12/2012 8:22:16 PM

anyone in this country who gets fired for failing a drug test (when they can complete their job efficiently and effectively)

7/12/2012 8:24:47 PM

A former manager of my first job was fired for embezzling money.
Paying her home power and cable bill with company checks.

7/12/2012 8:25:34 PM

Lol one guy i worked with in high school, went to a movie during lunch and called back 2 hours later saying he wasn't going to come back. Haha

7/12/2012 8:26:10 PM

guy was moving, and stole empty boxes on his day off.

7/12/2012 8:27:22 PM

Dude I used to work with would come into work every day... read the news paper for an hour, talk to his wife for 30 minutes, then spend the rest of the day looking at internet porn

he got ratted out, and reprimanded - told not to look at porn


a few weeks later, he was back to his normal schedule of reading the news paper, talking to his wife, and then looking at internet porn.

I mean, if you walked by his cubicle, you could see the tittyballs and vag spreads all over his computer screen.

Anyway, he was eventually fired. Then a few months later, a buddy of mine that works at Northrup Grumman called me like "OHHHHH, SNAP! Looks like we stole one of your employees! HAHAHA". Apparently, they had just hired the guy

7/12/2012 8:27:55 PM

Quote :

"I need to go dumpster diving at lowes apparently"

This.

7/12/2012 8:55:10 PM

Quote :

"Friend of mine got fired from Food Lion for eating a doughnut that was labeled to be thrown out. He's brought them home before and they taste just fine you just can't sell them after a certain date. He had been a manager at that store for 3 plus years."

Hate to break this to you.... But thats NOT what he got fired for.

7/12/2012 8:56:43 PM

I didn't work with this guy, but my favorite from the industry is about a guy who lied to an interviewer about his qualifications for a union magazine article, including claims that he was an F-16 pilot in the guard and a firefighter for the FDNY, neither of which were true.

Long story short, aforementioned magazine is circulated among thousands of his peers, a few who were in the squadron he claimed to be a part of. He was fired shortly after.

Now that I think about it, there was a guy I did work with who was fired for forging signatures on probationary performance evaluations.

7/12/2012 9:41:42 PM

Wing manager at McDonalds I worked at got fired for skimming cash off of people's cash drawers...like $20 at a time. She was none too bright about it....when everyone on her shifts started losing $20 every drawer (including the honors student and the other wing manager's son) the general mgr got wise pretty fast.

7/12/2012 10:10:15 PM

When I worked at Lowe's back in college, there was a guy that was a part-time employee that would come in on his days off and clock in and leave. Then come back after a few hours and clock back out. Since you could clock in/out from any computer in the store, no one was the wiser. He was usually only scheduled 20-25 hours but his checks were for 35-38hrs. Apparently he had been doing it for quite a while since usually the management only looked to make sure no one went over 40 hrs.

When I was hired on as a superintendent with a custom home builder, another super was fired a couple of weeks after I started. Apparently he would check in at the office once or twice a day but would rarely go out to his home sites. He would spend the day at the movies or the lake or something but would keep his phone on so as to answer if anyone called. My boss knew what he was up to but wanted someone to replace him (me) before he fired him.

7/12/2012 10:27:08 PM

7/12/2012 10:27:30 PM

A guy I know was working at a poolside bar or something like that in college. A lady came up and asked for a cappuccino, but he didn't have a cappuccino machine, any other way to get her a cappuccino, and he was the only one there and couldn't leave. She was pissed and complained, and he was fired for not making her the cappuccino because apparently she was "important."

7/12/2012 10:30:55 PM

This would be much better thread if it was Worst things you've seen poeple do and not get fired for

7/12/2012 10:34:16 PM

At a part-time retail job I had, there was a rule (pretty standard in retail) that you cannot chase a shoplifter if they make it out of the store. Well we had an assistant manager who not only chased someone out of the store, but got in his car and followed them out of the parking lot, only giving up several minutes later when the crook lost him at a stoplight.

He was fired immediately upon returning to the store.

7/12/2012 11:46:29 PM

^^if i posted those then there is a good chance i might catch shit for it. somehow. someway. they would find out i posted it on tww and make my life hell. i have a goldmine though.

7/12/2012 11:49:15 PM

does fired = kicked out of the navy? because people down here do some absolutely ridiculous shit, get caught, usually lie about it after the fact, and then get kicked out.

7/12/2012 11:59:34 PM

sub shop

Manager got fired for skimming for months, but they didn't call the cops (He would come in and drop off a cash envelope for the owner every 2 weeks). guy had worked there for like 10 years, and was really good friends with the owners He would void orders out, and then take the cash for the voided subs. I think he was skimming about 40-50 a day. We caught him on a slow day, he would do his voids ~2pm (when we did the mid day til). The incoming sup just happend to run an hourly report early (looking at sales from 2-230 ish). showed negative value. We did about 100 of sales an hour.

Teeter: lazy woman employee finally got fired, they had been trying for years, since she honestly didn't do shit, but there you didn't really have to. They tried to fire her a few times for not doing her job, or not showing up, but she would call the NAACP, and the threat of negative publicity/protest outside teeter would have cost the store more money than she made in a year. Finally caught her stealing fish from the sushi people, which she said she was moving (sushi is separate company). Still no firing.

Finally caught her on video eating a 99 cent sub. and got rid of her. BTW it was common practice for everyone to eat a spare cookie or chicken finger...mgmt new, supervisors knew, hell they all participated. You only got fired, if you they wanted you out.

Best employee i worked at at harris teeter, awesome guy, cleaned and hard worker. Anyway, the "Random" drug tests (seemed like they would target a few they wanted to nail, and a few good employees they knew were clean). Well they figure this upright, hard worker was clean. Guy pops on coke, no wonder why he worked so hard.

jersey mikes, guy gets fired for stamping out 10 free sub cards for his buddy. Which would have been okay if his buddy, who we all knew, didn't come in 2 days later and try to redeem 3 fresh cards.

Guy at harris teeter dodges 2 random drug tests (first he says he has to go to bathroom, and leaves for the afternoon). second, it tests as being 70ish degrees he filled with toilet water). Guy was a 50 year old stoner, used to take 1hr long breaks, and come back in wearing sunglasses at 9pm at night. One day he told me he smoked some bad weed, and he was freaking out cause it probably had PCP in it.

Guy got fired at jersey mikes for pouring jalapeno juice on a ladys cheesteak, after she bitched that he put jalapeno's on top of, but not mixed into the first one he made.


I almost got fired at harris teeter, on my last day. Setup shots in the break room (of water), and had all my buddies back there with me (about 1/2 deli sect). Had somebody flag down the manager and we all took them when he walked into the break room door. He turned red, started shaking and walked out (think the teacher in bevis and butthead), he eventually came back



[Edited on July 13, 2012 at 6:52 AM. Reason : dd]

7/13/2012 6:46:26 AM

Quote :

"Hate to break this to you.... But thats NOT what he got fired for."

was going to post that. that's just the excuse they use when they want you gone because they dont like you.

7/13/2012 7:10:06 AM

Guy I used to work with worked at the same company as his wife (who seemed like a total bitch) and turns out she was having an affair with some other guy in the office. They had been banging it out in the small conference rooms in the office for over 6 months and the affair got so serious that they were planning on leaving their spouses. For some reason they had the bright idea that they needed to tell HR about the affair I guess since they worked together, but the dumbasses not only told HR about the affair, they also told them that they had been having sex in the office on a regular basis and thus both were fired.

I guess we will just consider that darwinism.

7/13/2012 5:42:55 PM

Quote :

"this one dude at work got fired for murdering his wife."

7/13/2012 5:46:45 PM

Quote :

"guy was moving, and stole empty boxes on his day off."

I didn't look carefully but I hope I'm not the only one who picked up on this.

7/13/2012 5:53:27 PM

at my old job some co-workers were getting it on in some storage closets. the chick was married, or going through a divorce, can't remember which. the dude had a long-term girlfriend (10+ years). it was pretty common knowledge (to everyone except me, apparently) but neither of them lost their jobs over it. doesn't seem fair when people are getting let go for being late due to not having consistent transportation yet doing a great job, while other people are ignoring responsibilities and having sex instead.

7/13/2012 5:56:57 PM

A guy was in court over a violation to the restraining order his ex-girlfriend took out on him and he decided to yell and argue with the judge about it and was slapped with six months in jail for contempt of court. He called the office from jail because he didn't know the boss' number saying that he couldn't make his shift that night (working mids) and asked if I could tell the boss (whom I had to call while he was on vacation). Needless to say, the company deemed him a security risk and tossed him out.

7/13/2012 6:06:39 PM

Quote :

"absolutely corrupting a female coworker and acquaintance of mine"

what's that mean?

[Edited on July 13, 2012 at 6:14 PM. Reason : he told her how babby is made?]

7/13/2012 6:13:57 PM

I know a guy who got fired from J Crew after 7 years for punching in his employee number whenever he worked the register and defrauding the company of thousands of dollars in commissions.

Later he got fired from a downtown falafel restaurant.

He'll be 30 next month and he still tells people that he's taking break before law school.

7/13/2012 6:33:56 PM

Quote :

"I know a guy who got fired from J Crew after 7 years for punching in his employee number whenever he worked the register and defrauding the company of thousands of dollars in commissions. "

I'm confused. What did this do? Give the customers his employee discount or something?

7/13/2012 6:38:42 PM

Gave him commission on everything that he rang up instead of on sales that he made.

7/13/2012 7:16:15 PM

^i mean... if he rings someone up, is he not selling them stuff??

7/13/2012 9:00:58 PM

sounds like he was stealing the commission from other employees and keeping it for himself

7/13/2012 9:06:56 PM

how so? if he rang them up weren't they his customer? or did he log his name into all the registers that other people used? (sorry, retail isn't my thing)

7/13/2012 9:40:26 PM

Set em up!

7/13/2012 9:43:05 PM