LunaK LOSER :( 23634 Posts user info edit post |
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Quote : | "Seth Horvitz, a Northeast D.C. resident, thought he had ordered a new high-definition television a few days ago through Amazon.com from a third-party merchant. When the package arrived yesterday, however, Horvitz opened the oddly shaped box to find something completely different.
A very big gun.
Instead of the flat-panel TV he had bought to enjoy with his wife, who is pregnant, Horvitz opened the long packaging to discover a Sig Sauer SIG716, a high-caliber, semi-automatic assault rifle capable of mowing down, well, just about anything. Its manufacturer, Swiss Arms AG, describes it as "the rifle of choice when you require the power of a larger caliber carbine." Awesome.
Not surprisingly, Horvitz and his wife, Seeta, were shocked to find a gun instead of the television they thought they had ordered. They called the Metropolitan Police Department right away. David Cole, a friend of Horvitz's said that Seeta's reaction was "basically 'get that out of here now.' "
The District's gun laws might have slackened in recent years, but assault rifles are still verboten, as is transporting them into or through the District. That's why Horvitz had to call the police; it would have been illegal for him to pack it in his car and take it back to UPS for a return shipment. MPD officers confiscated the gun and are investigating why it wound up in a Northeast D.C. apartment building rather than the Pennsylvania gun shop it was intended to reach.
The box was dropped off in the hallway outside yesterday afternoon, with a 7.6 pound, 37-inch-long assault rifle sitting inside. The SIG716 carries a suggested retail price of $2,132.
"[Police] were a little confused at first, they've never seen anything quite like it," Horvitz told Fox 5 last night.
Also, it's not a television.
UPDATE, 10:45 a.m.: Ty Rogers, an Amazon spokesman, declined to say what the company is doing to remedy the situation." |
http://dcist.com/2012/08/dc_resident_orders_tv_amazon_delive.php
okay this is kinda funny 8/8/2012 2:35:43 PM
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Jeepin4x4 #Pack9 35780 Posts user info edit post |
] 8/8/2012 2:38:06 PM
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djeternal Bee Hugger 62661 Posts user info edit post |
I saw this on the news this morning, but I will refrain from the [old] post.
Instead, I will say that I would have kept my damn mouth shut. Take the gun to NC and sell it for $2k at a gun show, and buy a more badass TV. 8/8/2012 2:40:52 PM
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Beethoven All American 4080 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "Also, it's not a television." |
Lol. 8/8/2012 2:42:40 PM
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justinh524 Sprots Talk Mod 28507 Posts user info edit post |
I don't see how he could actually think there was a tv in that box. 8/8/2012 2:43:04 PM
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BlackJesus Suspended 13089 Posts user info edit post |
Why would he turn it in?
SUCKA 8/8/2012 2:57:20 PM
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Kurtis636 All American 14984 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "semi-automatic assault rifle" |
Does not compute.
Oh, nope, hold on, it has a rail mount system.  8/8/2012 2:58:16 PM
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red baron 22 All American 2166 Posts user info edit post |
watta fuckin liberal hippy douche. "OH MY GOD ITS A GUN IN A BOX!!!!!!!! DONT TOUCH IT, DONT TOUCH IT, IT MAY START KILLING EVERYONE. DONT MAKE IT ANGRY. CALL THE POLICE, CALL THE POLICE....HELP THERES A GUN LOOSE IN MY STUDIO APARTMENT!!!!!!!!!!"
Yes, rail mount=assault rifle to a stupid liberal hippy douche
[Edited on August 8, 2012 at 3:01 PM. Reason : .] 8/8/2012 2:59:43 PM
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pilgrimshoes Suspended 63151 Posts user info edit post |
i, for one, am skeeved out by his living quarters. 8/8/2012 3:01:03 PM
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djeternal Bee Hugger 62661 Posts user info edit post |
Technically, Amazon should get arrested for even shipping it to D.C. 8/8/2012 3:02:34 PM
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BigMan157 no u 103356 Posts user info edit post |
im surprised there aren't any crocs in that pile 8/8/2012 3:02:41 PM
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Slave Famous Become Wrath 34079 Posts user info edit post |
Somewhere, Lee Boyd Malvo smirks 8/8/2012 3:03:42 PM
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Snewf All American 63547 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "watta fuckin liberal hippy douche. "OH MY GOD ITS A GUN IN A BOX!!!!!!!! DONT TOUCH IT, DONT TOUCH IT, IT MAY START KILLING EVERYONE. DONT MAKE IT ANGRY. CALL THE POLICE, CALL THE POLICE....HELP THERES A GUN LOOSE IN MY STUDIO APARTMENT!!!!!!!!!!"
Yes, rail mount=assault rifle to a stupid liberal hippy douche " |
I came in here to post something to that effect ironically but it turns out red baron already did it for me (unironically?) 8/8/2012 3:03:49 PM
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Kurtis636 All American 14984 Posts user info edit post |
I bet those food and water bowls are for a cat.
From reading this article and seeing the picture I'm going to go ahead and say that this guy is a complete pussy and probably a pseudo-intellectual dickbag. I bet he loved the Lumineers before they got all commercial. 8/8/2012 3:04:27 PM
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red baron 22 All American 2166 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I came in here to post something to that effect ironically but it turns out red baron already did it for me (unironically?)" |
great minds think alike dude 8/8/2012 3:05:33 PM
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djeternal Bee Hugger 62661 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "Technically, Amazon should get arrested for even shipping it to D.C." |
Yeah, I just quoted myself.
Furthermore, I never knew you could buy assault rifles on Amazon.com 8/8/2012 3:06:22 PM
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red baron 22 All American 2166 Posts user info edit post |
if i put a rail mount and a flash suppressor on an 1861 springfield, as well as paint it black, does it become an assault rifle 8/8/2012 3:09:22 PM
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darkone (\/) (;,,,;) (\/) 11612 Posts user info edit post |
^^ You can't. It didn't come from Amazon. It came from a 3rd party Amazon Marketplace seller who royally screwed something up.
[Edited on August 8, 2012 at 3:11 PM. Reason : not enough ^s] 8/8/2012 3:11:06 PM
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djeternal Bee Hugger 62661 Posts user info edit post |
Well then that dude should be arrested
Unless it was me. I would love to buy a $1000 TV and have a $2100 Assault Rifle show up at my door.
[Edited on August 8, 2012 at 3:13 PM. Reason : a] 8/8/2012 3:12:35 PM
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Beethoven All American 4080 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "if i put a rail mount and a flash suppressor on an 1861 springfield, as well as paint it black, does it become an assault rifle" |
I think you have to add a "shoulder thing that goes up" a la Rep. McCarthy. 8/8/2012 3:14:45 PM
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djeternal Bee Hugger 62661 Posts user info edit post |
and a compass, and a thing which tells time
[Edited on August 8, 2012 at 3:17 PM. Reason : a] 8/8/2012 3:16:48 PM
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jtw208 5290 Posts user info edit post |
^^ ah yes, the lethal, terrifying horrible barrel shroud 8/8/2012 3:22:48 PM
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Skack All American 31140 Posts user info edit post |
It's ironic that his living room strongly resembles the kitchen he works in. 8/8/2012 3:27:00 PM
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TreeTwista10 minisoldr 148863 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "I bet those food and water bowls are for a cat." |
8/8/2012 3:29:29 PM
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terpball All American 22489 Posts user info edit post |
What does the fact that his wife has a parasite living in her stomach have to do with anything? 8/8/2012 3:30:00 PM
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ThePeter TWW CHAMPION 37709 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "David Cole, a friend of Horvitz's said that Seeta's reaction was "basically 'get that out of here now.'" |
~ 8/8/2012 3:31:16 PM
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TreeTwista10 minisoldr 148863 Posts user info edit post |
^that'd be my reaction too, if i ordered a tv, and instead when i opened the box, inside was a live alligator 8/8/2012 3:33:38 PM
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djeternal Bee Hugger 62661 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "Unfortunately, the 3rd baker's rack he purchased was on backorder" |
8/8/2012 3:34:52 PM
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terpball All American 22489 Posts user info edit post |
What the FUCK does David Cole have to do with anything? Why was he even interviewed? 8/8/2012 3:35:06 PM
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djeternal Bee Hugger 62661 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "We attempted to contact cheapeyeglasses.com for comment, but they did not return our call" |
[Edited on August 8, 2012 at 3:37 PM. Reason : ed] 8/8/2012 3:37:14 PM
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pilgrimshoes Suspended 63151 Posts user info edit post |
i bet this guy makes his own cheese
and it's terrible
BUT IT'S DIY MANN 8/8/2012 3:38:37 PM
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ThePeter TWW CHAMPION 37709 Posts user info edit post |
i'm pretty sure the rifle would be way more entertaining to his wife anyway
[Edited on August 8, 2012 at 3:42 PM. Reason : someone has to wear the pants in the house]
I didn't see this part
Quote : | "MPD officers confiscated the gun and are investigating why it wound up in a Northeast D.C. apartment building rather than the Pennsylvania gun shop it was intended to reach." |
So it's just a case of fucked up delivery? Probably still has the correct address on the box and the hipster is just gonna try to milk this story for all its worth
[Edited on August 8, 2012 at 3:44 PM. Reason : lkj] 8/8/2012 3:42:27 PM
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Skack All American 31140 Posts user info edit post |
I guarantee this dude has thought about indoor composting with earthworms and kitchen scraps. 8/8/2012 3:47:47 PM
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djeternal Bee Hugger 62661 Posts user info edit post |
And the gun shop owner in PA is all like "Sweet, a TV!!!" 8/8/2012 3:49:11 PM
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Hadjuk 83" of class 2521 Posts user info edit post |
You don't have carpet, put your fucking shoes on!!! 8/8/2012 4:12:35 PM
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TreeTwista10 minisoldr 148863 Posts user info edit post |
is he wearing tight-fitting sweat shorts? 8/8/2012 4:14:47 PM
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pilgrimshoes Suspended 63151 Posts user info edit post |
they're man-pris
so the fixie chain doesn't get black grease on the skinny jeans 8/8/2012 4:15:50 PM
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Beethoven All American 4080 Posts user info edit post |
There's also what appears to be a hanger, holding open his door. 8/8/2012 4:16:27 PM
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pilgrimshoes Suspended 63151 Posts user info edit post |
guy probably lives on /r/frugal
let's take bets on the shitty things he's got pickling there
looks like garlic, those small onions, something else 8/8/2012 4:18:25 PM
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Smath74 All American 93281 Posts user info edit post |
I was going to reply with things that resemble the following comments:
Quote : | "Instead, I will say that I would have kept my damn mouth shut. Take the gun to NC and sell it for $2k at a gun show, and buy a more badass TV." |
Quote : | "watta fuckin liberal hippy douche. "OH MY GOD ITS A GUN IN A BOX!!!!!!!! DONT TOUCH IT, DONT TOUCH IT, IT MAY START KILLING EVERYONE. DONT MAKE IT ANGRY. CALL THE POLICE, CALL THE POLICE....HELP THERES A GUN LOOSE IN MY STUDIO APARTMENT!!!!!!!!!!"" |
Quote : | "I bet those food and water bowls are for a cat. " |
thank you tdub for doing it for me.  8/8/2012 4:19:43 PM
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OopsPowSrprs All American 8383 Posts user info edit post |
That gun is illegal in DC. What else should he have done besides call the police? I'm confused. 8/8/2012 4:20:47 PM
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bottombaby IRL 21958 Posts user info edit post |
Uhm, yeah. With how terrorist crazy the country is and the fact that he freakin' lives in the capitol, I'd be inclined to call the po-po instead of attempting to just mail it back. 8/8/2012 4:22:02 PM
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BigHitSunday Dick Danger 51059 Posts user info edit post |
they tried to set him up with a gun that has bodies on it 8/8/2012 4:22:41 PM
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djeternal Bee Hugger 62661 Posts user info edit post |
I guarantee that the cooler on the bottom shelf does not belong to him. One of his buddies brought it over full of some shit craft beer for a Harry Potter marathon. When the guy left, he said "no worries, bro, just get it back to me whenever". That was 6 months ago 8/8/2012 4:24:30 PM
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Beethoven All American 4080 Posts user info edit post |
^hey hey, don't bring Harry into this. 8/8/2012 4:25:00 PM
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djeternal Bee Hugger 62661 Posts user info edit post |
Quote : | "Uhm, yeah. With how terrorist crazy the country is and the fact that he freakin' lives in the capitol, I'd be inclined to call the po-po instead of attempting to just mail it back." |
I would be more inclined to realize that I just hit the internet shopping lottery. 8/8/2012 4:26:27 PM
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tchenku midshipman 18598 Posts user info edit post |
that AR clone is $2000?
at $1/round, i'd return that thing too  8/8/2012 4:40:37 PM
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djeternal Bee Hugger 62661 Posts user info edit post |
If you'll spend $2k on an assault rifle, then you can afford the rounds.
Similar to someone complaining about the insurance cost on a Ferrari, or the fuel costs on a Hummer. 8/8/2012 4:48:10 PM
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richthofen All American 15758 Posts user info edit post |
I think I would have noticed that the box wasn't exactly TV-shaped when signing for the delivery. Can't imagine a HDTV would have been drop delivered. But ignoring that for the moment...
Quote : | "I would be more inclined to realize that I just hit the internet shopping lottery." |
I would imagine the logistics of that could get tricky though. Suppose he receives a call in a couple of weeks: "Hi, this is Amazon, we appear to have sent you a gun instead of your TV. We'd like it back please."
"You sent me the wrong item, not my fault, I'm keeping it."
"Sorry, that's not allowed. If you keep it we'll get the authorities involved."
"Do you realize you broke the law by transporting that into DC?"
"Do *you* realize you're *breaking* the law by keeping it in that case?"
I just don't see how that would turn out well, as nice an idea as it is. 8/8/2012 4:48:14 PM
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kdogg(c) All American 3494 Posts user info edit post |
is he wearing capris? 8/8/2012 4:48:39 PM
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