So, my butt has been giving me quite the runaround lately and just being a complete asshole.

I tried washing scrubbing the affected area (the butt) and it turns out that scrubbing probably was a bad idea. Butts, it seems, are really delicate.

So I bite the bullet and get me some of that there Preparation H cream.

Let me tell you what: That stuff is magic.

Yeah it feels like i just got manloved by the Swamp Thing, but my butt feels like a new butt.

The first fifteen seconds after application to the butt, the butt is overcome with an intense, tooth cracking pain not unlike having your butt attacked by things created by merging bullet DNA and fire DNA.

I hear models use it on their assy faces to shrink the tissue under their gaunt baggy skeleton eyes before shoots too

10/17/2013 9:59:51 PM

message_topic.aspx?topic=585208&page=1

10/17/2013 10:05:18 PM

the &page=1 was really necessary there, buddy roe

10/17/2013 10:06:20 PM

butt is my favorite word i think

actually butts plural

10/17/2013 10:18:25 PM

Yeah. "Butt" is a pretty magnificent word.

I am sorry for your butt problems, EMCE, I hope you have resolved them satisfactorily.

10/17/2013 10:24:38 PM

Smooth sailing here, now.

10/17/2013 10:27:20 PM

10/17/2013 10:31:19 PM

I too have a leaky butt

10/17/2013 10:34:38 PM

i wonder if you can get a colostomy bag installed to allow the butt to heal. I wonder how detrimental that would be to the fortitude of the butt. "Butt atrophy" if you will

10/17/2013 10:37:48 PM

Right. You already smell your feces when you take a dump anyway. Why not not get close and personal!

10/17/2013 10:39:17 PM

pro-tip: don't confuse those Clorox disinfecting wipes with cottonelle wet wipes

10/17/2013 10:40:48 PM

This thread is starting to make me uncomfortable, in a "while getting a blowjob, my date started lick my asshole, and I didn't wipe very well earlier" type of way

10/17/2013 10:42:21 PM

so what do you guys think of ass

10/18/2013 8:49:20 AM

uhh do you mean butts? don't appreciate that kind of language here

10/18/2013 8:52:32 AM

Quote :

"pro-tip: don't confuse those Clorox disinfecting wipes with cottonelle wet wipes "

i have done that. i had a really messy one and they were they only thing available besides single ply sandpaper. yikes!





also, jock itch cream will take care of butthole problems too. Micatin, Lamisil, etc.

10/18/2013 9:10:56 AM

IM STICKIN' WITH THE "H"

10/18/2013 9:20:36 AM

active ingredient in prep-H is witch hazel. you can get a giant bottle for like $3. squirt it on your cushy tp of choice (cottenelle aloe for me)


also, prepH "totables" are the shit for work and your backpack

10/18/2013 10:26:47 AM

Fermat what did you do to hurt your butt? over wiping?

10/18/2013 10:37:21 AM

i pooped a big poop and I think i did the whole space shuttle o-ring deal. critical failure

10/19/2013 1:34:31 AM

Yeah, pooping a big poop gets me every time.

10/19/2013 11:27:35 AM

I thought of this: http://www.dumbingofage.com/2011/comic/book-2/01-pajama-jeans/vouch/

10/19/2013 4:17:10 PM

that's a really racist comic. that black girl is all made up like aunt fucking jemima. get that bitch an apron and a wooden spoon

10/21/2013 12:40:54 AM

thats the worst shit
wiping and finding blood on the tp

10/21/2013 7:35:32 PM

Stupid blood-fart

10/21/2013 8:02:04 PM

I'm sorry. I had some bloody shit tp last week, but I think it was from abrasive tp and making a lot of wipe passes.

10/21/2013 8:58:03 PM

jesus christ another fucking terrible lewisje webcomic

10/21/2013 9:17:20 PM