Last night I had my first wet dream. 30 years old and it finally happened. The dream was fucking awesome too

5/6/2015 3:59:12 PM

congrats on puberty, dawg

welcome to the new, hairier, smellier you

5/6/2015 4:12:48 PM

Solved rubiks cube

5/6/2015 9:30:53 PM

Took a selfie with an ostrich yesterday. I didn't know that was on my bucket list, but...

5/6/2015 11:26:21 PM

Took a selfie with yuffie_chan yesterday. Next on the list is "Fly."

5/6/2015 11:45:16 PM

Next on my list is to pay my taxes. Always wanted to do that

5/7/2015 9:52:08 AM

two girls at the same time

5/7/2015 10:14:09 AM

two girls at the same time

never settle for a fat chick

5/7/2015 10:26:49 AM

be a dick on the internet. check.

5/7/2015 12:05:21 PM

live in a van down by the river

5/7/2015 12:19:26 PM

Eat a sandwich while taking a shit


Feels weird man...

5/7/2015 12:35:59 PM

sounds awesome, but only if my bitch makes it for me

5/7/2015 12:46:44 PM

Quote :

"Took a selfie with an ostrich yesterday. I didn't know that was on my bucket list, but..."

LOL, that reminds me of the time I took a picture of the back of an ostrich's throat...

...I was taking a close-up of an ostrich's head and the it snapped really fast and tried to bite the camera. I ended up pressing the pic button at the exact time the ostrich's mouth was around the protruding camera lens without realizing. Got home and looked at pics and found it and was all like

5/7/2015 12:47:04 PM

Nifty anecdote, brethren

5/7/2015 12:48:46 PM

^^care to share?

5/8/2015 10:16:13 AM