Specifically when group dining.

It is HILARIOUS!!
Best way to do it:

1. Split it evenly among you*
2. Everyone pays for their meal*
====================
GO!



*^{plus the meal of the birthday boy or girl girl if the reason for dining as a group is to take them out for dinner. Certain restrictions apply in NY, CA, FL, MD, WI, TX, RI.}

1/26/2016 4:30:57 PM

oops

[Edited on January 26, 2016 at 4:33 PM. Reason : oops double post]

1/26/2016 4:32:02 PM

3. Pay for everyone's food like Jesus would do.

Your Ego only exists to tell you which mouth to put the food in

in b4 Splitting the bill at a planned parenthood

1/26/2016 4:33:03 PM

I fail to see the hilarity.

1/26/2016 4:33:31 PM

4. Credit Card Roulette - Everyone throws a card in a hat and your server picks one (or more for big tabs)

1/26/2016 4:34:10 PM

5. reach for your wallet and hope someone else pays first

1/26/2016 4:35:38 PM

just act like you are going to the bathroom and leave before everyone else.

1/26/2016 4:37:45 PM

Recently we've been using Splitwise:

https://secure.splitwise.com/

It's super easy to use and hooks up to Venmo. One person pays and everyone else Venmo's them. Otherwise we just split it evenly among everyone. If people try to do the whole "pass the bill around and mark what you got" thing I smack them.

1/26/2016 4:39:54 PM

Well, I find the social awkwardness pretty darn funny.

Like, for example... Say a group of 14 guys and girls go out to eat as a celebration of their status as beautiful individuals. One of the 14 people orders a $9 salad, with water to drink; where the rest of the crew ordered $20 menu items and each had a beer.
Bill comes! How do you want to split that?
Evenly? I'm sure that guy that ordered a salad doesn't think it's so even
Everyone pays for their meal? Shit, some restaurants won't even split a check that many ways. And if they do, are you going to put the server through all of that...for what...maybe a few dollar benefit to you?

1/26/2016 4:40:26 PM

seriously though, i don't have this problem because i don't have friends.

1/26/2016 4:42:11 PM

#2

1/26/2016 4:45:14 PM

Quote :

"Like, for example... Say a group of 14 guys and girls go out to eat"

i don't have enough friends

if it's, say, 3 couples (a somewhat regular occurrence with me and my friends) then it's pretty easy to split the bill. but once you start getting more people and some are paying for one meal, some paying for two meals...it's too complicated. usually i'd say pay for your meal and tell the waiter/waitress as you order. if you don't tell them when you order then it's probably a lotta trouble to go back and figure what everybody got (especially when you start sharing appetizers with several people)...so at that point just split it evenly imo

1/26/2016 4:45:28 PM

^ Reminds me of an episode of Friends




[Edited on January 26, 2016 at 4:47 PM. Reason : f]

1/26/2016 4:46:56 PM

just rotate who pays the whole bill. its usually the same people anyways

1/26/2016 4:47:14 PM

One person pays and everyone else venmo's them.

1/26/2016 4:55:15 PM

Why is this still a problem in 2016? Even truck stops have POS that typically tracks food & drinks by seats, it takes more work to divide up a bill evenly than have everyone pay for the shit they ordered.

1/26/2016 4:56:41 PM

That Portlandia sketch

Aw yes:

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4p8mhQ9wINI

[Edited on January 26, 2016 at 4:59 PM. Reason : Link]

1/26/2016 4:56:50 PM

^^^What I always do especially if I'm making 2-5% cash back.

[Edited on January 26, 2016 at 4:58 PM. Reason : s]

1/26/2016 4:56:55 PM

Man, I just realized my group of friends never really does the going out for dinner thing. Usually we'll all just agree to meet up at one of a few bars in our rotation and hang, drink, and eat up at the literal bar. Bartenders tend to have everything separate anyway.

1/26/2016 4:57:32 PM

I think splitting evenly is for classy people or something.

I pay for everybody or just mine.


The worst is when there are lots of drinks, and you didn't drink.

1/26/2016 5:01:24 PM

Quote :

"Even truck stops have POS that typically tracks food & drinks by seats, it takes more work to divide up a bill evenly than have everyone pay for the shit they ordered."

Obviously you're not a server

[Edited on January 26, 2016 at 5:02 PM. Reason : ^ yah or when you're drinking $3 beers and others are drinking $12 glasses of wine]

1/26/2016 5:02:24 PM

If the server doesn't ask about separate checks beforehand, somebody usually just puts it on their card and everyone else gives them cash or drugs

1/26/2016 5:08:05 PM

The best is work travel. I always grab that check. Free monies.

1/26/2016 5:10:12 PM

Why aren't you treating if you're getting reimbursed?

Duuude.

1/26/2016 5:15:35 PM

Yes, there's something to be said about asking this question beforehand. But no one ever does that, because we are a notoriously difficult and heinous species.

What about that guy that says you know, I didn't really enjoy the service. I don't think our waiter deserves a very good tip. ?

1/26/2016 5:16:41 PM

he's talking about his 1-5% cashback

[Edited on January 26, 2016 at 5:20 PM. Reason : ^^]

1/26/2016 5:20:34 PM

Quote :

"Why aren't you treating if you're getting reimbursed?"

What do you mean? I mean if there's 8 people at a company dinner and it's a $1200 bill and my Chase card has 5% cash back on restaurants at that time I'm most certainly going to try and grab the bill for $60 directly to me. That's free money.

^Thanks.

[Edited on January 26, 2016 at 5:22 PM. Reason : s]

1/26/2016 5:22:18 PM

I see now.

I get that y'all are all ballers and stuff, but $1200 for a normal 8-person meal is still crazy to me. That's twice as much as I'd expect unless you're celebrating something.

1/26/2016 5:27:43 PM

That's only $150/person. Pretty easy once you start adding bottles of wine, various courses, etc.

But no you're absolutely right. It's not like I'm spending that money myself. Business dinners just get charged to the client. Haha.

1/26/2016 5:33:30 PM

$150/person? Maybe for a snack after a day trip to the slopes. $150/person is what poor people pay for an average meal.

1/26/2016 5:36:52 PM

I wipe my ass with $150

each time I wipe, it's a new $150


basically 3 perforated $50 bills per wipe

1/26/2016 5:38:30 PM

We just pay the waiters in dabs now.

1/26/2016 5:42:13 PM

Quote :

"there's something to be said about asking this question beforehand. But no one ever does that"

I feel like every restaurant I got to with more than just one other person, the server always asks before how checks are being split up. Really isn't too difficult.

That being said, if you aren't spending at least your entire paycheck per person per average meal you are poor and you shouldn't be eating food. I spend at least $10k on dinner each day.


(Sidenote: I only eat platinum and diamonds. It's actually made me quite sick but it's worth it to be a baller)

1/26/2016 5:43:40 PM

occasionally I'll tip around $150 - but only when the service is really, really bad. anybody who leaves $150 tips on a regular basis is either laughably poor or a complete sociopath. probably both.

1/26/2016 6:04:34 PM

Quote :

"I get that y'all are all ballers and stuff, but $1200 for a normal 8-person meal is still crazy"

That's just neodata being neodata. You must remember he does his best networking in the hot tubs at Vail.

[Edited on January 26, 2016 at 8:07 PM. Reason : Our resident humble bragger in chief]

1/26/2016 8:04:28 PM

Quote :

"I think splitting evenly is for classy people or something."

If it's an hour long dinner with a drink or two then it's not too much trouble for #2, but if it's 2-3 hours and you're having cocktails, several courses, bottles of wines, then whats a few dollars difference for a several hundred dollar dinner with another couple or two.

1/26/2016 11:09:19 PM

LOL

1/26/2016 11:18:11 PM

It really depends on whom you are with.

If your out with a bunch of co workers/ people within the same income bracket (+/- 15k) and nobody decided to be extravagant compared to everyone else(order the $80 filet with lobster tail and a $70 dollar bottle of wine with 2 $15 dollar martinis) sure split it.

In general I've noticed people are pretty consistent (within a bracket), so if your among a group of friends its not likely to ever even out money wise. Dave will order his gluten free organic non dairy salad for $15 and 1 glass of organic wine for $10, and Barry will drop $50 on the surf and turf with 2 beers and a scotch for $100. It's not going to change, and it wont ever level out. Barry is always going to spend more than Dave. and every meal the money balance gets more out of proportion.

For way different income brackets, a split is almost never fair. If you have 5 people at a table and 3 make 100k+ and the other 2 make 20-40k (assuming all other factors are even) you need to allow the people making less money the opportunity to control their budget. I don't think when I order that second $8 mimosa and the $10 chicken and waffle plate, they on the other hand might not have $40 to drop on brunch, and might just enjoy a cup of coffee and a egg sandwich. Splitting stuff evenly can damage the friendship. Paying for their meal can also damage the friendship (puts things off balance). Its better to let each pay for their own and enjoy each others company.

[Edited on January 26, 2016 at 11:38 PM. Reason : dd]

1/26/2016 11:33:30 PM

Quote :

" Barry will drop $50 $240 on the surf and turf pudding"

1/26/2016 11:48:14 PM

^well at those places the damned organic salad is going to fucking have truffles on it and some kinda olive that was pre-digested by a fucking lemur, so thats going to be $240 as well.

1/27/2016 12:09:45 AM

its pretty crazy how restaurants don't have a way to keep track of individual orders. no i dont want to split it evenly because you fuckers eat A LOT.

1/27/2016 12:16:05 AM

Quote :

"its pretty crazy how restaurants don't have a way to keep track of individual orders. no i dont want to split it evenly because you fuckers eat A LOT."

What am I reading

1/27/2016 9:30:34 AM

Quote :

"For way different income brackets, a split is almost never fair. If you have 5 people at a table and 3 make 100k+ and the other 2 make 20-40k (assuming all other factors are even) you need to allow the people making less money the opportunity to control their budget. I don't think when I order that second $8 mimosa and the $10 chicken and waffle plate, they on the other hand might not have $40 to drop on brunch, and might just enjoy a cup of coffee and a egg sandwich. Splitting stuff evenly can damage the friendship. Paying for their meal can also damage the friendship (puts things off balance). Its better to let each pay for their own and enjoy each others company."

That makes complete sense. We only ever do an even split if everyone agrees and spent roughly the same. If it's an uneven split we work it out. Venmo/Splitwise make this process very smooth as long as you grab the consolidated receipt.

Quote :

"That's just neodata being neodata. You must remember he does his best networking in the hot tubs at Vail."

Ha. A night at a nice place in Vail's going to cost you way more than $150/night. That's just a cheap steak dinner . But no go to the George if you go to Vail. It's super cheap. Top shelf liquor happy hour (3-9pm) is only $4.50/drink and you can get a surf and turf for under $20.

I did actually do some more networking a few weekends ago at the hot tub in Vail. Met some folks in software sales. Very productive.

1/27/2016 9:57:03 AM

Just curious what your monthly rent or mortgage payment is. I can probably feel better knowing mine is much lower. Cost of living ftw.

1/27/2016 10:01:40 AM

Quote :

" A night at a nice place in Vail's going to cost you way more than $150/night. That's just a cheap steak dinner "

1/27/2016 10:01:51 AM

^^Google says rent prices are 36% higher in Denver than Charlotte which sounds about right. It's still far cheaper than many larger cities. With all the new apartments they're building in Charlotte I imagine rent can't be skyrocketing too much there. Developers are afraid to build here so there's a capacity problem.

^Aww thanks. I'm allowed to be sarcastic too.

[Edited on January 27, 2016 at 10:08 AM. Reason : s]

1/27/2016 10:06:42 AM

He just can't help himself.

1/27/2016 10:19:21 AM

I would never split a bill evenly if there was any other option. I want to order what I want to eat based on my budget. I don't want anyone to feel like they have to pay more because I chose to eat more one night and I don't expect to pay more because someone else thought a couple glasses of wine was a good plan either. Everyone pays for what they eat and just enjoy the company rather than worrying about what everyone else ordered.

1/27/2016 10:22:49 AM

^^You can't either. I've only been doing it after you now.

1/27/2016 10:33:16 AM

Brag on, bruh.

1/27/2016 11:04:04 AM