Early this morning, I put $18.88 worth of diesel into my Nissan Altima before I got tired of having to carefully aim the fuel directly into the hole thingy...so I stopped there and went on down the road.

I can't decide if this is better or worse than the time I lit my car door on fire and decided to smother it with leftover Chinese food.

Never mind the times I've driven off with the gas pump still in the car--thank goodness for those detachable pump thingies.

Still, my shining moment has got to be when I magically spun out into someone's driveway/lawn before deciding that I could right the matter by gunning it through their culvert. Totaled the car and walked up the road with an armful of CDs...

Seriously, y'all, I did it! (And nobody taught me how to syphon. )

9/29/2016 5:53:24 PM

congratulations

9/29/2016 5:58:54 PM

tldr



[Edited on September 29, 2016 at 5:59 PM. Reason : 2]

9/29/2016 5:58:59 PM

^^Thank you. I checked with the Internet, and I'm not entirely alone on this foolishness.

But I also needed to share and wanted some attention for all the embarrassment of today.

[/thread]

9/29/2016 6:16:01 PM

I was wondering what the fuck this was all about, and then I realized it was a BridgetSPK thread and Nissan doesn't make a diesel Altima.

*slow clap*

You should date Smath74. I bet we could get some high quality nonsense threads then.

[Edited on September 29, 2016 at 7:05 PM. Reason : tag]

9/29/2016 7:05:16 PM

this seems not good

9/29/2016 7:06:12 PM

im no fancy automobile scientist, but that doesn't seem correcty

9/29/2016 7:14:07 PM

Better than gas in a diesel engine.

Also better than confusing diesel fuel with coffee.

9/29/2016 7:20:48 PM

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaatttttt

9/29/2016 8:12:04 PM

This is what happens when you're a dick in dead baby threads

9/30/2016 1:46:58 AM

I'm not even sure "you're a dick" encompassed what happened in that thread.

9/30/2016 1:51:49 AM

Love everything about this

Re: syphoning. Insert tired cock sucking joke here

9/30/2016 5:27:14 AM

wat

9/30/2016 8:01:23 AM

Quote :

"Better than gas in a diesel engine."

my wife's best friend borrowed her car (a diesel jetta) about 10 years ago, and was trying to be nice and re-fuel it. she's already got the pump going, putting gasoline in it, and calls her husband to ask "Hey, premium is the same as diesel, right?"

9/30/2016 9:20:17 AM

My brain keeps trying to autocomplete ;spin: to :meatspin: every time I see this thread. Thanks, TWW.

9/30/2016 9:30:02 AM

Back during that gas shortage I was wondering what would happen if I put a few gallons of diesel in there. Wouldn't have done it, but I was wondering! It was awful up here.

PS - There should be an app that lets you know when a gas shortage is forecast due to supply problems or whatever. On the first day we had all the lines up here, I only got 15 cause I didnt realize what was up and thought it was just my station close to home. Luckily for me, the station by my house had gas before I ran out of that 15.

[Edited on September 30, 2016 at 9:35 AM. Reason : $$$$$$]

9/30/2016 9:34:03 AM

good work SPK!

9/30/2016 4:49:24 PM

I actively monitor my language to avoid repetition.

And still...decide, decided, deciding...thingy, thingies...

Drunk me is especially lazy with words and sentence structure.

[Edited on September 30, 2016 at 5:16 PM. Reason : ]

9/30/2016 5:15:30 PM

Is there an adverb more useless than "actively"?

9/30/2016 6:18:19 PM

Very

9/30/2016 6:23:08 PM

she was like all they out of gas but deez-el do fine

9/30/2016 6:41:28 PM

Y'ALL GOT BOFA?

9/30/2016 7:23:39 PM