This is an actual text I have just received from my wife.


Side note she has degrees from both Duke and UNC...

1/15/2018 5:35:20 PM

maybe she took classes with a lot of basketball players

1/15/2018 5:38:21 PM

lolllll

1/15/2018 5:46:45 PM

broil it then microwave it

1/15/2018 6:08:09 PM

I don't think they teach bacon cookery in college.

1/15/2018 6:08:21 PM

throw that bitch in the oven

(the bacon)

1/15/2018 6:08:58 PM

I think she answered her own question

1/15/2018 6:10:20 PM

Get the pan extra hot.

Throw a bunch of bacon in there.

After 30 seconds, dodge the spitting oil while you flip the wrinkly pieces.

Quickly start eating that batch while you prepare the next one properly.

Eat the second batch, too.

After an hour, realize that bacon headaches are not a myth. Munch on salami rolls while you investigate the phenomenon.

1/15/2018 6:24:36 PM

using the oven is the way to go for mass bacon cooking

[Edited on January 15, 2018 at 6:29 PM. Reason : the baconing]

1/15/2018 6:29:35 PM

Grilled bacon

1/15/2018 6:31:01 PM

put the bacon in a cold pan

add enough water to just cover the bacon

simmer for 30 minutes, stirring occasionally

1/15/2018 6:32:38 PM

You’re 0-3 in this marriage.

1/15/2018 7:17:21 PM

sous vide

1/15/2018 7:46:27 PM

Bacon should be baked.

1/15/2018 7:54:37 PM

I just buy beggin strips, they're precooked.

1/15/2018 7:56:21 PM

i put it on a cold pan and cook it low and slow but im patient

[Edited on January 15, 2018 at 7:59 PM. Reason : dump grease in backyard before put eggs on pan]

1/15/2018 7:58:37 PM

I don’t like baked bacon as much as bacon out of a frying pan.

It is also my opinion that breakfast sausage > bacon. Country ham > bacon. Probably sausage > country ham > bacon...but bacon is nevertheless v good

1/15/2018 8:58:39 PM

grilled bacon is the best. then oven or cast iron skillet.

1/15/2018 9:28:40 PM

^^this guy knows what's up with regards the breakfast meats.

1/15/2018 9:47:36 PM

ham and bacon are in the wrong place

1/15/2018 10:10:08 PM

I need additional information on her cooking skills.

I'm far from a misogynist...but that would worry me about someone I was suppose to spend the rest of my life with.

1/15/2018 10:12:48 PM

Quote :

" dump grease in backyard before put eggs on pan"

This dude doesn't cook. Bacon grease has all kinds of uses, especially in southern cuisine but also in general.

Quote :

"I don’t like baked bacon as much as bacon out of a frying pan"

You don't like perfectly cooked bacon?

[Edited on January 15, 2018 at 10:22 PM. Reason : Country ham is good, but Neese's hot sausage and Wright bacon hold special places in my heart that can't be ranked]

1/15/2018 10:19:53 PM

The entire point of cooking the bacon first is to use the grease for the eggs

1/15/2018 10:57:05 PM

And then take it to Moore Square to feed the growing homeless population

1/15/2018 11:07:03 PM

^^ to be fair there is some residual grease post dumping.

1/15/2018 11:20:16 PM

this motherfucker calls Kate Upton fat, then brags about cooking eggs in bacon grease

1/16/2018 12:20:50 AM

Quote :

"You don't like perfectly cooked bacon?"

i would argue that you're the one that doesn't like perfectly cooked bacon. bacon in the oven is easier and more consistent than in the pan...i won't argue. i don't think it tastes better. all around, imo, it's better in the pan.

also...i have perhaps the hottest take of this thread. i prefer bacon with a little chew than bacon that's so crispy it just crumbles.

everybody likes different shit i guess

1/16/2018 5:37:41 AM

add tide pods to your bacon pan for a burst of fresh flavor

1/16/2018 9:33:49 AM

Take some bacon and I'll put it in a pancake

1/16/2018 9:46:22 AM

I recently cooked some bacon in an air fryer. It was delicious.

1/16/2018 10:37:40 AM

Quote :

"i prefer bacon with a little chew than bacon that's so crispy it just crumbles. "

definitely the right way to cook bacon.

1/16/2018 11:56:27 AM

Is an air fryer just a small convection oven?

1/16/2018 11:58:09 AM

^Basically, I think. But I think it circulates the air faster than a normal convection. It's been my experience that it does taste like the food is "fried" even though little to no oil is used. I've done wings, chicken tenders, fish bites, and cut a sweet potato into speers, it all came out good. I was surprised how well it works.

1/16/2018 12:04:36 PM

Now y'all have me thinking about taking a heat gun to some bacon.

[Edited on January 16, 2018 at 1:16 PM. Reason : how did a leave out a whole word?]

1/16/2018 12:54:55 PM

Quote :

"i have perhaps the hottest take of this thread. i prefer bacon with a little chew than bacon that's so crispy it just crumbles."

Quote :

"bacon in the oven is easier and more consistent than in the pan...i won't argue. i don't think it tastes better. all around, imo, it's better in the pan."

I like that the oven cooks it evenly throughout...will try a pan next time I need to make a smaller amount though. Been a while.

1/16/2018 1:03:20 PM

for crispy bacon in the pan you can add water to cover the bacon, boil off the water, then finish the bacon. If I'm planning on cooking other things in the pan this is what I do, otherwise I do the broil+microwave method.

1/16/2018 1:31:26 PM

1. preheat oven to 400*
2. place bacon on baking sheet
3. bake for 11-14 minutes, depending on thickness and desired consistency
4. remove from oven and eat all of the bacon
5. you're welcome

1/16/2018 1:43:39 PM

Quote :

"I need additional information on her cooking skills."

She can bake which I am terrible at, but I'm far and away the better cook. She is very book smart and if there is a highly detailed recipe she can do okay but she get's antsy whenever she sees me just eyeballing some measurements. She needs precision and can't roll with the punches and doesn't seem to be able to taste and adjust as she goes along. Plus she just somehow missed some of these things growing up. There are sometimes where I just have to look at her and wonder when she asks me certain things.

Also, I somehow got the only NY Italian mother in law that can't (and usually doesn't) cook.

That said I scored well out of my league in most other respects

1/16/2018 1:45:57 PM

his wife saw this thread, is what he's saying

1/16/2018 1:58:43 PM

Lol nah, she would tell you the same thing.

She has also sincerely asked me how to bake a potato before.

1/16/2018 2:00:31 PM

cast iron bacon press

1/16/2018 2:35:16 PM

Quote :

"That said I scored well out of my league in most other respects"

But you're aging gracefully. Depending on how she ages, you'll eventually be more attractive than her, cook better than her, and most importantly, not be the most obnoxious Carolina fan to walk this earth, which she most certainly is.

1/16/2018 4:27:30 PM

I usually cook a whole pack of bacon at once, so that entails baking as much as I can in the oven while cooking the rest in a frying pan so that I will have some easily accessible residual grease for cooking my eggs or pancakes.

Any leftover bacon is kept for future BLTs or salads.

1/16/2018 5:06:21 PM