yovo yovo bonsoir
Alright, TWW, here's the thing: when I married a lady of the Hebrew persuasion, I got excommunicated from my church, but I figured, "It'll be worth it, because I was going to hell anyway, and at least I won't have to buy her Christmas presents." Turns out I was right, but also wrong. I didn't have to get a Christmas gift, but apparently I was supposed to buy a Hanukkah gift. I didn't, and now I'm in the doghouse.*
But you can save me.
This is our dog, Bea:
When I found Bea, shackled in a pile of her own filth in Ikpinle, Benin, West Africa, she was destined for the dinner table. I know this because the mean old hag who sold her to me charged double on the grounds that she was "almost full grown." But I bought her, and did not eat her. Instead, she became my Peace Corps partner. After three years, I airlifted her out of Benin in a daring - well, not so much "daring" as "expensive" - rescue, and now she lives with my other Peace Corps partner and myself in Washington, DC.
What does this have to do with my interfaith holiday dilemma?
My wife entered Bea into a "Cutest Dog" contest. I generally disapprove of such shenanigans, but if I can help my (slightly obese) dog's body image and distract everybody from my gift efficiencies all at a stroke, them I'm all for it. So please, go and vote for Bea. If she wins, maybe my wife won't try to circumcise me a second time.
*-Actually she doesn't give a shit but it's December so I need a holiday hook.
12/5/2018 8:02:31 AM