User not logged in - login - register
Home Calendar Books School Tool Photo Gallery Message Boards Users Statistics Advertise Site Info
go to bottom | |
 Message Boards » » I need to rent a white person Page [1] 2, Next  
EMCE
balls deep
89687 Posts
user info
edit post

Only for 20 minutes or so. The ideal candidate has that innocent, nerdy, professional look. You won't have to do anything but come over to my house and sit here.


Apply within.

1/8/2023 6:38:23 AM

The Coz
Tempus Fugitive
24256 Posts
user info
edit post

I feel like I got the stated qualifications, but I don't live anywhere close to you.

1/8/2023 7:26:39 AM

EMCE
balls deep
89687 Posts
user info
edit post

Yeah, it would be easier if you're in the DMV

1/8/2023 7:29:29 AM

bbehe
Burn it all down.
18369 Posts
user info
edit post

Send me your address

1/8/2023 8:59:01 AM

Kickstand
All American
11343 Posts
user info
edit post

What's the ideal penis size for your candidate?

I'm not doing this for free. My time as a white person is valuable.

1/8/2023 10:53:30 AM

ShawnaC123
2019 Egg Champ
46681 Posts
user info
edit post

I'm in.

1/8/2023 10:55:35 AM

aaronburro
Sup, B
52655 Posts
user info
edit post

Are towels provided?

1/8/2023 11:40:58 AM

Money_Jones
Ohhh Farts
12370 Posts
user info
edit post

You trying to get your house appraised for a fair value?

1/8/2023 1:08:40 PM

EMCE
balls deep
89687 Posts
user info
edit post

Yeah, appraiser comes Tuesday at 11

1/8/2023 1:10:54 PM

The Coz
Tempus Fugitive
24256 Posts
user info
edit post

A white person should do this for free.

1/8/2023 1:26:25 PM

EMCE
balls deep
89687 Posts
user info
edit post

The last time I made a white person stay in my home without paying them, the police got involved.

1/8/2023 1:34:21 PM

The Coz
Tempus Fugitive
24256 Posts
user info
edit post

They should pay YOU!

1/8/2023 2:04:01 PM

aaronburro
Sup, B
52655 Posts
user info
edit post

You did take down all the Action Jackson posters, right? Get the purple drank out of the fridge?

1/8/2023 2:40:24 PM

EMCE
balls deep
89687 Posts
user info
edit post

I know it's a joke, but yeah...

Since before the house went on the market...before any photos were taken...before anyone but the realtor saw the house...

We removed any pictures, personal care products, or decorations that might hint that black people own this house. We even debated taking all of the spices out of the spice cabinet except for salt, pepper, spite, and envy.

https://www.nytimes.com/2022/11/02/realestate/racial-bias-home-appraisals.html








By the way, I contacted LunaK about this, because she lives in the area. She was of no help. She'll probably vanity search in some point in the future, and find this thread. Please shame her when she does show up, because I most likely won't be here to see it.

1/8/2023 4:20:24 PM

justinh524
Sprots Talk Mod
27086 Posts
user info
edit post

Rent to own?

1/8/2023 7:15:41 PM

aaronburro
Sup, B
52655 Posts
user info
edit post

^^ it's total bullshit, but you have to do it. If I were in the area, I'd totally hang out for a few to halp out. I'd even drop a deuce in your toilets. America seriously sucks ass sometimes.

1/8/2023 7:43:01 PM

TreeTwista10
Forgetful Jones
147486 Posts
user info
edit post

you should try calling up J'Biden

1/8/2023 8:48:48 PM

aaronburro
Sup, B
52655 Posts
user info
edit post

Sleepy Joe? It ain't like he doin anything

1/8/2023 8:54:44 PM

The Coz
Tempus Fugitive
24256 Posts
user info
edit post

Quote :
"Please shame her when she does show up, because I most likely won't be here to see it."

Uh oh. EMCE, plz. Are you OK?!

1/8/2023 10:12:11 PM

GrumpyGOP
yovo yovo bonsoir
18111 Posts
user info
edit post

I meet all the qualifications and am conveniently located in the DC suburbs.

1/9/2023 10:31:32 PM

aaronburro
Sup, B
52655 Posts
user info
edit post

But do you smell of patchouli? Also, the smell of Benin is still about you. Bad plan

1/9/2023 10:42:28 PM

justinh524
Sprots Talk Mod
27086 Posts
user info
edit post

Please wear this to EMCE's house

1/9/2023 10:52:10 PM

aaronburro
Sup, B
52655 Posts
user info
edit post

Yovo yovo

1/9/2023 11:09:23 PM

GrumpyGOP
yovo yovo bonsoir
18111 Posts
user info
edit post

Alas, in this faithless and dissolute era of "middle age," I possess not one set of matching Benin clothes, all of the pants having been destroyed by various means. I smell of quality beard oils and financial security. In the Benin years, I could happily sit in the back of a station wagon with three other passengers for hours, waiting for the driver to find two more people to cram in the front to maximize his fare. Now, I throw a hissy fit if the Turkish Air Lounge tells me that they're too crowded to honor my PriorityPass access. What has become of me?

1/10/2023 8:37:56 AM

rjrumfel
All American
22901 Posts
user info
edit post

Man I hope you're not having it appraised for a refi or a move. I mean unless you have to move for work or something. These rates blow right now.

1/10/2023 9:55:11 AM

Money_Jones
Ohhh Farts
12370 Posts
user info
edit post

So how’d it go? You get a far valuation?

1/10/2023 11:11:19 PM

nacstate
All American
3785 Posts
user info
edit post

1/11/2023 8:13:38 AM

fatcatt316
All American
3754 Posts
user info
edit post

Have you thought about going the White Chicks route?

1/11/2023 9:33:47 AM

The Coz
Tempus Fugitive
24256 Posts
user info
edit post

EMCE strikes me as more of a Chuck Taylor man:

1/11/2023 11:16:40 AM

EMCE
balls deep
89687 Posts
user info
edit post

The buyer postponed the appraisal

1/11/2023 12:31:22 PM

UJustWait84
All American
25794 Posts
user info
edit post

That's racist!

?

1/11/2023 2:04:45 PM

ShawnaC123
2019 Egg Champ
46681 Posts
user info
edit post

Is this still available?

1/11/2023 8:15:33 PM

Lionheart
COVID-19 Negative
12759 Posts
user info
edit post

Seriously though White Chicks House Staging LLC would make a killing in the DC area. Come in and stage places with the most basic Karen shit ever and fake family photos and live laugh love paraphernalia.

Tagline "Make racism work for you!"

1/12/2023 4:07:23 PM

EMCE
balls deep
89687 Posts
user info
edit post

I've thought about putting stock photos of you people on the cloud so I can ave them cycle through the Amazon Echo.

1/12/2023 4:59:22 PM

moron
All American
33692 Posts
user info
edit post

our white real estate agent sat in our house during the appraisal. I thought it was really weird of them to volunteer for this, but in retrospect I realize now they were looking out

1/20/2023 11:54:51 PM

fatcatt316
All American
3754 Posts
user info
edit post

Looking out for their commission

1/21/2023 9:41:34 AM

EMCE
balls deep
89687 Posts
user info
edit post

I just left the house empty while the appraiser was here.


Definitely de-blackified my house beforehand by getting rid of all colorful things. My house looked tapioca as fuck.

2/1/2023 9:51:00 PM

aaronburro
Sup, B
52655 Posts
user info
edit post

White people can detect cocoa butter from two miles away. I hope you accounted for that

2/1/2023 10:25:53 PM

StTexan
Suggestions???
5800 Posts
user info
edit post

^lol

2/2/2023 12:00:43 AM

EMCE
balls deep
89687 Posts
user info
edit post

House appraised at the anticipated value.


I left a few subtle clues around the house.
- a hand written recipe on the fridge for Zucchini Casserole
- Irish spring in the shower
- hung a picture of a Schooner on the wall
- love, live, laugh paper board sign
- Candle scent: Laundry Detergent
- Left a pair a Birkenstocks in the closet

[Edited on February 8, 2023 at 4:49 PM. Reason : h]

2/8/2023 4:40:41 PM

The Coz
Tempus Fugitive
24256 Posts
user info
edit post

^
LOL!

Double LOL if you actually did that.

And also, I'm sorry on behalf of white people if you actually did that.

2/8/2023 7:09:10 PM

Walter
All American
7507 Posts
user info
edit post

Sorry brah, all of my whites are booked up through May.

2/8/2023 7:53:42 PM

EMCE
balls deep
89687 Posts
user info
edit post

I sold my home today.

https://redf.in/2J6Ha6

2/24/2023 6:53:15 PM

ShawnaC123
2019 Egg Champ
46681 Posts
user info
edit post

Congrats, MC

2/24/2023 7:39:54 PM

The Coz
Tempus Fugitive
24256 Posts
user info
edit post

Congratulations! Get the money! Dolla dolla bill, y'all!

Next level big brain move staging all those electric guitars. They would never suspect a black person had lived there.







2/24/2023 7:40:01 PM

EMCE
balls deep
89687 Posts
user info
edit post

I luv 2 slappadabass

[Edited on February 24, 2023 at 10:58 PM. Reason : low end 4 lyfe]

2/24/2023 10:57:26 PM

justinh524
Sprots Talk Mod
27086 Posts
user info
edit post

Hey man lemme borrow $500,000

2/24/2023 10:58:35 PM

EMCE
balls deep
89687 Posts
user info
edit post

2/24/2023 11:07:21 PM

synapse
play so hard
60908 Posts
user info
edit post

Quote :
"Alas, in this faithless and dissolute era of "middle age," I possess not one set of matching Benin clothes, all of the pants having been destroyed by various means. I smell of quality beard oils and financial security. In the Benin years, I could happily sit in the back of a station wagon with three other passengers for hours, waiting for the driver to find two more people to cram in the front to maximize his fare. Now, I throw a hissy fit if the Turkish Air Lounge tells me that they're too crowded to honor my PriorityPass access. What has become of me?"


Jesus buddy just make a substack please. Subscribe me to your paid newsletter.

2/25/2023 12:12:06 AM

StTexan
Suggestions???
5800 Posts
user info
edit post

I see emce meant walter white lol

2/25/2023 12:18:06 AM

 Message Boards » Chit Chat » I need to rent a white person Page [1] 2, Next  
go to top | |
Admin Options : move topic | lock topic

© 2024 by The Wolf Web - All Rights Reserved.
The material located at this site is not endorsed, sponsored or provided by or on behalf of North Carolina State University.
Powered by CrazyWeb v2.38 - our disclaimer.