i slipped on some icy stairs today and ripped a hole in my pants and burnt a hole in a cashmere sweater

1/21/2010 8:32:52 PM

My toilet paper is only two ply, and they make 3 ply. This is such bullshit.

1/21/2010 8:33:24 PM

my dog wants to go out but I don't really want him out in the yard when it is wet, and he might dig.

1/21/2010 8:34:33 PM

I have to watch hulu to see my shows since I havent set up cable yet

1/21/2010 8:43:32 PM

whoa whoa

whoawhoawhoa

is there a first world problem?

1/23/2010 8:41:35 PM

Youtube isn't working because IT screwed something up when messing with the servers so I had to cancel my classes for the day.

1/25/2010 12:39:43 AM

I finally wrapped up all my work stuff and am ready to leave for lunch, and a song I really love just came on Pandora, so now I want to stay and listen to it.

1/26/2010 1:09:56 PM

i forgot to get a toothpick and this piece of steak is annoying the shit out of me

1/26/2010 3:39:53 PM

On a flight recently, my father cracked a joke, and all the children laughed. Unfortunately, I couldn't hear him, because I was in the front of the plane, in first class.

1/26/2010 3:49:43 PM

gotta pee

brb

1/26/2010 3:50:54 PM

My butt hurts from sitting in this office chair all day browsing the internet at my job.

1/26/2010 4:23:49 PM

Youtube got blocked at work

1/26/2010 5:25:05 PM

no one can agree on the State-Carolina Rivalry.

1/26/2010 5:26:27 PM

its a farce

1/26/2010 5:30:04 PM

my new mexican neighbor's surround sound sounds like a freight train is barreling through the upstairs apartment. he's not responding to the universal apartment "turn that shit down" signal of three pounds on the wall, likely because he can't fucking hear it because there's a fucking freight train barreling through this apartment.

1/31/2010 10:14:40 PM

seriously, its fucking midnight. turn that shit down or i'm going to write an angry letter to the management.

1/31/2010 11:52:14 PM

why don you go and ask him to stop in person

1/31/2010 11:55:09 PM

Yo no hablo español

1/31/2010 11:58:03 PM

^ I believe the Spanish for shut the fuck up is, "SILENCIO MOTHERFUCKER."

2/1/2010 1:13:36 AM

i just got a very funny mental picture of that


also, which shoes to trek to class in......

2/1/2010 8:18:24 AM

my fuji apple tastes a little funny this morning.

2/1/2010 9:00:27 AM

i left my ipod at home

NOW I HAVE TO LISTEN TO THESE 5 CDS I HAVE AT WORK INSTEAD OF THE 150 GIGS OF MUSIC I COULD BE CHOOSING FROM

FUCK

2/1/2010 9:06:50 AM

My shampoo and conditioner were frozen in my bathroom today????? I'm not sure if that's a problem of 1st world- or the opposite bc I live in the ghetto of five points.

2/1/2010 10:36:41 AM

Quote :

"^ I believe the Spanish for shut the fuck up is, "SILENCIO MOTHERFUCKER.""

i just LOL'd

2/1/2010 10:38:17 AM

Last night, our front load washing machine shook the massive container of detergent into the floor. The lid busted off and we had a Sam's Club sized mess of high efficiency liquid to clean up.

2/1/2010 11:22:23 AM

happened to my fiancee's mother once except it was a bleach bottle and she had the dogs crated up on the other side of the enclosed room. they almost died.

2/1/2010 11:25:02 AM

i want a fun job

2/1/2010 11:36:15 AM

My FiOS advertised that I should be downloading at 25mbs, but I am only clocking 19mbs.

2/1/2010 11:36:57 AM

I just got a new box of checks and my phone number is wrong on every one of them.

2/2/2010 12:06:35 PM

I can't decide which Caribbean island to go to on my honeymoon. I have only managed to rule out Haiti and Cuba.

2/2/2010 12:20:50 PM

k

wait I got one

I gotta go to work LOL!

2/2/2010 12:46:38 PM

My teacher told me she was going to raise the bar for me in class because I told her I was in the gifted programs in school when she asked us.

2/2/2010 12:47:49 PM

Yesterday in the laboratory a metal chair tore up the gorgeous lining of my wool coat. I called the store where it was purchased and they said if I opened up a credit card with them then they could fix it for me complimentary. I want my coat fixed, but I don't wanna part with my baby for a week!

First world problems.

2/2/2010 2:04:21 PM

FWP, if you will

2/2/2010 8:13:09 PM

My guess is the first world problem would have been when Adam and Eve ate fruit from the tree of knowledge.

2/3/2010 12:00:31 AM

My wireless router stopped responding and I had to get off my ass and walk all the way to the other room to go unplug it and restart.

THE OTHER ROOM PEOPLE

2/3/2010 12:07:15 AM

A+ for effort for Big4Country

2/3/2010 12:08:03 AM

i went to put my laundry from the washer into the dryer but the dryer had clean clothes in it.

so i just didn't switch em

2/3/2010 12:10:18 AM

Accidentally flipping through channels, seeing Glenn Beck spout a whole bunch of loony nonsense, then making the mistake of yelling at the TV for being stupid.

2/3/2010 12:14:15 AM

Dreading going back to the doctor because I know I'll be prescribed medicine that I will have to take every day for the rest of my life.

2/3/2010 12:18:14 AM

I am having a beer at 5am because my roommates toilet cracked and flooded into the kitchen downstairs. I've felt like I've had to shit so hard that it would break the toilet. I did not know it was technically possible though.

2/3/2010 5:20:31 AM

sense

do you make it

2/3/2010 5:21:18 AM

I have an 8 am this morning and I am really tired from watching the office all night

2/3/2010 5:38:50 AM

I couldn't decide between the cherry custard pie and the brown sugar chiffon cake at Starbucks. I ended up getting the pie but I think the chiffon cake would have tasted better

2/3/2010 6:06:08 AM

Tough decision. After reading that im hungry but the fridge is on the other side of the room

2/3/2010 6:08:58 AM

i avoided ice cream because my hands were already too cold

2/3/2010 7:42:09 AM

I bought bagels on Monday, and I haven't opened them yet. Now I see that they're on sale buy one get one free starting today.

2/3/2010 9:26:35 AM

still got your receipt? many grocery stores have a money back guarantee. you could just take them back and say these bagels suck!

2/3/2010 9:32:52 AM

I could, but that would involve doing stuff. It's easier to just complain.

2/3/2010 9:36:59 AM

the yoga instructor that i really like isn't going to be at class tonight - so now i have to settle for a stranger

2/3/2010 9:39:46 AM