got a guy here who thinks every problem he encounters is unique, ie can't reset the resolution on his ps3 or doesn't know what phone to buy, etc

in other words, he doesn't understand how google works

3/8/2012 8:46:56 AM

I hate when people can't use google.

3/8/2012 8:48:24 AM

Coworker has the theme song from The Office as her text message alert. She gets a text every 5-10 minutes and lets it play a few seconds before picking her phone up. KILL ME!

3/9/2012 7:28:23 AM

We all sit in low-walled desk/cube things, but we have breakout and meeting rooms that we use for conference calls, etc.


We have visitors from other locations come to visit, and instead of parking the visitors at empty desks (of which we have 70+), the admin staff puts them into our meeting rooms.

Add to this with the fact that no one on the IT staff seems to understand that if you add a meeting room as a resource to your exchange server, everyone can look at the calendar and see if a room is taken.

What ends up happening is you will walk around the office looking for a meeting room before your meeting, only to find that all the fucking rooms are either occupied, or have a PIECE OF PAPER taped outside the door that says "RESERVED" so you'll get yelled at by the office Nazi if you use the room.

This has a tremendous trickle-down effect.

Every single meeting starts late because of this. Every single meeting runs over.

3/9/2012 7:43:46 AM

Have this girl who sits behind me and makes remarks (just loud enough so everyone hears her) every time she has the tiniest issue or is excited about something. Stuff like "oh my god are you kidding me?". This happens multiple times a day.

LIKE ANYBODY FUCKING CARES, JUST DO OUR GODDAMN JOB LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE DOES.


She's actually worse than the lady next to me who curses like a sailor to everyone - including vendors and business partners - in a professional corporate environment, in her awful cockney accent.

[Edited on March 9, 2012 at 7:46 AM. Reason : .]

3/9/2012 7:44:38 AM

I have a co-worker who sips out of their water bottle every 3-5 minutes. Except they don't just sip out of the bottle, they slurp out of in this visceral, loud manner. It sounds filthy and disgusting and makes me want to gag almost every time I hear it (which is about 2e10 times per day)

3/9/2012 8:21:17 AM

Quote :

"She's actually worse than the lady next to me who curses like a sailor to everyone - including vendors and business partners - in a professional corporate environment, in her awful cockney accent. "

that's awesome!

3/9/2012 8:24:56 AM

I have a teacher who uses my classroom to teach spanish during my planning period, and today is "I'm going to show the kids all sorts of mexican dances" day...

just and FYI to any teachers out there... PREVIEW youtube videos BEFORE you show them in class.

especially when the name of the dance is roughly translated to "The Dog Dance"

[Edited on March 9, 2012 at 8:30 AM. Reason : ]

3/9/2012 8:29:46 AM

^Please tell me if this is Ms. Carlsson (Bethany iirc), she may be married now and have a new last name actually...

3/9/2012 9:41:20 AM

^no, i'm not sure who that is.

3/9/2012 6:37:40 PM

Coworker always taking off for the most retarded reasons, but makes sure she tells everyone why. I don't care why you need a day off, and don't tell me especially if its not important.

Before I had surgery she had to take a few days off to prepare her brain for me being gone. I mean I HAD THE SURGERY lol.

She sends an email out today saying she's having furniture delivered so she won't be in tomorrow, and will work through lunch on Thursday so she can leave early, and is off on Friday to go to the beach with her girlfriends.

WTF? Why do I feel guilty if I take off for something random like that? I need to get over it and just say I WON'T BE HERE TOMORROW. I'm still tempted to take a half day on Friday to watch the State game.

so

3/12/2012 1:13:05 PM

^if she is basically at or below your position then you definitely should, fuck 'em you should anyway. Seriously a mental day to prepare for someone else's surgery??

3/12/2012 1:15:52 PM

Quote :

"Before I had surgery she had to take a few days off to prepare her brain for me being gone. I mean I HAD THE SURGERY lol."

Haha. Wow. I wouldn't feel guilty for taking a day off for any reason where you work. 75 degrees out, the commute feels like it might be a hassle, my dog's birthday, etc.

[Edited on March 12, 2012 at 1:17 PM. Reason : -]

3/12/2012 1:16:56 PM

So she's off this Friday and then in a week she's leaving for a week and a day to visit her son in St. Thomas.

This is also the lady that at the end of the year takes off every Friday because she has so much vacation time left over....NOT MY FAULT

3/12/2012 1:20:16 PM

You should tell her that you're taking off to prepare yourself for her vacation.

3/12/2012 1:20:57 PM

haha I just might actually

3/12/2012 1:37:22 PM

We got in a resume from a guy that's completely riddled with bad grammar and awful spelling and I get ribbed for it because he graduated from a high school in NC (West Mecklenburg High School)... Somehow one guy's resume is indicative of the intelligence level of everyone in NC...

Now it's being passed around for shits and giggles. We're supposed to be an organization that helps people

3/12/2012 2:46:09 PM

Quote :

"Somehow one guy's resume is indicative of the intelligence level of everyone in NC"

Agreed. They should not operate under the false assumption that most people in NC graduated high school at all.

3/12/2012 4:17:00 PM

^LOL.
On the other side of that coin, I've encountered plenty of highly educated people who can't spell for shit and make up their own grammar rules. Of course, most of them would at least double-check a job application.

3/12/2012 10:37:43 PM

You just slid that jar of candies closer to me because you KNOW you have no control and neither do I, and this is just your way of evening out the universe a little. Glad you brought something useful home from the expo, glad all my marketing collateral got compliments, glad we got some big clients this morning because of it all...

So get in mah belly111!!1

3/14/2012 9:41:42 AM

weather finally gets warm, so we cut the AC is on to like 60.

3/15/2012 9:29:48 AM

People acting like completely redesigning a website is the same thing as moving a picture in a Word document

3/15/2012 12:22:51 PM

Yeah, don't you just like drag and drop? OMG. Why are you taking so looooong???

3/15/2012 5:07:34 PM

fat people who control the thermostat

i am freezing

3/19/2012 4:55:14 PM

3/19/2012 4:55:47 PM

you don't have to yell for people to hear you over speaker phone

3/22/2012 9:44:37 AM

or how about my cube is outside the managers office and he will call me WITH THE DOOR OPEN on speakerphone

so I hear him talking to me, then hear him in my phone, and also hear myself replying back to him through his speakerphone which is also turned up as loud as possible

wtf

3/22/2012 10:12:29 AM

Litttlest one isnt eating, so I have to prod her and push her to eat per her parents, the other two see the attention she gets, they stop eating. I spend about 6 hours a day at work, and with lunch, snack, and dinner I sometimes spend three hours of that day fighting with an under weight malnourished 3 year old.

3/22/2012 10:19:05 AM

^^
lol, old people

3/22/2012 10:44:19 AM

Quote :

"This is also the lady that at the end of the year takes off every Friday because she has so much vacation time left over....NOT MY FAULT"

If she takes so many days off how in hell does she have so much time left over?

3/22/2012 2:53:31 PM

Our new accountant really pisses me off. She's super anal retentive, which okay yeah she's an accountant so duh, except she wants people to produce documentation out of thin air. I just had a 30 minute argument with her on no, the hotel won't give me an itemized receipt because I booked it through Expedia. We even CALLED the hotel during this conversation, they said I could get the receipt from Expedia and no they didn't have one separate from the Expedia booking, and she still wants me to get a receipt from this hotel

[Edited on March 26, 2012 at 10:57 AM. Reason : s]

3/26/2012 10:56:54 AM

^^They are very generous with our vacation time around here, but want you to take it all each year. People notoriously wait and then have an OH SHIT moment and start taking off random days. Most folks will take a Monday instead of a Friday or take some days during the week because of how crazy things get around here on Thursdays & Fridays. Not this lady...she takes Fridays off

^Stop booking through Expedia?

[Edited on March 26, 2012 at 11:40 AM. Reason : e]

3/26/2012 11:39:39 AM

ATTN: GROWN ASS MEN. IS IT REALLY THAT HARD TO RAISE THE TOILET SEAT IF YOU NEED TO PISS?

seriously. like, whats the concern here? "i don't wash my hands, so i don't wanna touch the toilet seat so instead i'll piss all over it" ??? use your damn foot sissy.

anyways

on yeah, and dude who took the last cup of joe and left the empty pot on the hot burner causing the lunch room to smell disgusting: you're on notice.

3/26/2012 11:45:01 AM

I don't want to touch the toilet seat and then my dick, so I use my shoe.

3/26/2012 12:46:16 PM

^^^ This is the first time it's ever been an issue. Everyone in our office uses some online booking for their business trips. She's just taking the rule book way too literally on this one. I predict a mutiny on this woman's hands if she's not careful

3/26/2012 4:36:12 PM

Quote :

"I don't want to touch the toilet seat and then my dick, so I use my shoe."

I don't know why but this made me laugh.

3/26/2012 4:39:01 PM

4/2/2012 1:44:08 PM

Got this email this AM from one of our two department admins:

Quote :

"I spoke with [department admin who was out all last week]. She is feeling much better; however, she needs to continue convalescing for a few more days. She believes she’ll be able to return to work on Thursday. If you need assistance in her absence, please see me."

Haha, who the fuck uses "convalescing" in an email like that??? Makes my bullshit meter shoot off the charts.

4/2/2012 1:52:18 PM

Read: Pussy Problems

4/2/2012 3:17:09 PM

Look, officemate. Right now I do not give a shit about your hippy bullshit that you want to use my product for. Leave me alone

4/2/2012 4:56:09 PM

^^^^ haha i lol'd

4/2/2012 6:55:23 PM

email server is down.

4/11/2012 7:59:46 AM

Our regular DHL guy is really nice but sometimes he comes in and reeks of clove cigarettes

4/11/2012 9:01:33 AM

better than reeking of regular cigarettes right?

4/11/2012 9:43:02 AM

Trying to get a computer on the network, not only is it not registered (fairly common for laptops that are primarily used offsite) but it's not even in our inventory.

Me: "Whoever set this up, it's not even in the inventory and someone left a temp hostname on it. How am I supposed to figure out what it's called? Who set this up, anyway?"

Coworker, looking at service history: "You did."

4/11/2012 10:14:15 AM

^^ lol true.

4/11/2012 10:17:26 AM

^^lol pwnt.

[Edited on April 11, 2012 at 10:18 AM. Reason : carat]

4/11/2012 10:17:59 AM

^^^ hahaha

4/11/2012 10:18:44 AM

Weeks ago, my boss said that another coworker and I should go to this free seminar which is relevant to one of my programs.

Another coworker found out that we are going and is super butthurt that he wasn't invited to go too, even though its a program he doesn't work on at all and the seminar subject is completely irrelevant to his work. Come on, son.

4/11/2012 4:07:36 PM

Yeah, tell that guy to tighten up.

4/11/2012 4:57:50 PM